TO KNOW OR NOT TO KNOW

Little ones, even my two-year-old great grandson, know about babies in tummies and that is how their siblings come to be born. In 'days of old' pregnancies were hidden and were mentioned as the mother's 'confinement'. And confinement it was as these mothers rarely went out and with flowing dresses and aprons were quite adept at hiding the bump.

I was 10 when my sister, Maureen, was born. When I told my friend, Caroline, that I had another sister she said that she didn't notice that mum was fat. I didn't know what that had to do with it but she said that all mothers get fat before a new baby comes. I remember being confused with the conversation but we were at the local swimming pool and we were soon splashing around again in the big pool, which we had promised our parents we would not enter unless one of them was present. Not our fault that they were too busy to supervise.

I remember my father telling me of the day Aunty Pat was born. He was 15 and his mother asked him to take her to the hospital on his way to work. They walked there with him carrying her suitcase and then she told him to leave her there and come in after work.

After work, he found her sitting in bed nursing a baby. To his utter amazement she told him that it was his new sister. He said "Where did she come from?"

Hard to believe? Not when a number of my friends have similar stories.

A golfing friend, Vi Penno, told me of her mother's marriage. This was held at the family home and when the guests had left and the cleaning-up was done, her mother retired into her bedroom. When the door opened and her new husband entered the room she looked at him and said "What are you doing in here?"

I was around 15 when a group of us were walking home from a rehearsal for a Catholic Ball where we were to lead the debutantes into the hall. We were to wear our pretty pink dresses which had been made specially for the occasion and we were very excited to be attending such an event.

On our way one of our friends spoke about a girl who was a couple of years older than we were and told us that she was pregnant but didn't know who the father was. My comment caused a stir as I said "Can't she just pick who she wants?" Silence followed. Then the friend who was relating the gossip said "We'd better shut up as SOMEONE doesn't know". They talked of other things and try as I might no one gave me any more info.

A few days later I quizzed the storyteller and she told me, very quickly, how it came about. I couldn't believe that she would make up such a disgusting story but gradually, after asking some other friends, I realised that this was what happened. I looked at my parents in a totally different light but didn't bring up the subject with them, ever.

And my sister, Pam, when she was pregnant and one of the youngsters mentioned how fat she was, she told her that she had a baby in there. The child looked, wide-eyes and asked "Oh, NO. Did you eat it?"

We all thought this is be a very funny story but my mother was quite shocked that Pam would actually tell a child this.

This was the first time that I had heard a pregnant mother give this answer and not brush off the child with a vague reason. Before your time, Pam. Before your time.

I also remember mum saying that Carole Fenning was not someone she would wish us to bring home. The reason: she overheard her yelling out, 'in the main street, mind you', that she couldn't go for a swim as she had her period.

I remember when I first heard about periods I couldn't believe that only females were subjected to this. "So Dad doesn't get them? Only girls? How fair is that!"